Can’t Buy Me Love (but can maybe get me a suh-weet pair of earphones)

How great it would be if we could all agree not to use money anymore.

I mean, there are a few products out there that I’d like to, nay, NEED to have in my possession but the internal struggle I go through day-to-day to NOT buy them exhausts me.

For example. I’ve got the new iPhone (with all it’s awesome features like call-dropping, fragile glass body and Vulcan nerve pinch susceptibility) which comes with earphones with a mic control.

Now, they are ok, these earphones, but after a while of wearing them (5 minutes,say) they become uncomfortable and that fucking wire?! Tangle, tangle. Not to mention the rubber seals that disintegrate readily.

So, I want to get shot of them and buy a decent pair but they need to have the control mic thingy (it is a phone after all) and my eyes descended on a pair of in-ear things called Beats Tour by Monster/Dr. Dre. Had a play with them and they are really good, not as great as the big over-ear (millionaire only) version but still great.

Dr. Dre Beats Tour - Sexy Bastards!

Trouble is now that they are in my head I can’t accept any other earphones BUT these Beats Tours.

It’s infuriating. I’m like an addict or something (well maybe that’s a little bit of an exaggeration).

I went as far as completing an order online right up to the part where you click the confirm button…at which point I slammed the laptop lid closed and threw the thing to the side, panting heavily and shaking a bit. Felt like you would after nearly ordering a hit on your arch nemises.

My Arch Nemises: Robin Van Persie - He's a Cock!

And then today, at work, I had no jobs to do so I drove back to the office and without meaning to I drove into the retail park – completely on auto-pilot, my voracious need to purchase an unnecessarily expensive set of in-ear headphones peaked and needing satisfied. Thankfully, I came to my senses and turned around back on the road towards the office.

When I got to the office I felt the need to ask Twitter for help and received nice replies telling me to go buy them. Thanks Twitter (you always know what’s good for me). However, I regained my will and stayed put.

That lasted 8 minutes when my colleague arrived for her shift. I pestered her for 10 minutes for a lift to the retail park to buy those blood red, money leeching, aural wondergadgets. Eventually, she relented, stating that she did not consider it “a lot of money for earphones anyway”.

We were all set to go when, again, my moral and financial aptitude shot up to “master” level and I threw myself back onto my chair and refused to move. She just shrugged her shoulders and left, shaking her head and mumbling something about me not being right in the head. All I could think was “I will be right in the head when those earphones are slotted into place! Oh, yes!”

So, with no vehicle and a big hike to get the Beats I decided to finish work and go home. I’m sitting here right now, typing this drivel and I think I’m getting over it – helped by the fact I am looking at some other nice looking earphones with a slightly less horrendous price tag. Though I still feel the little tug towards the Beats.

I’ll probably keep checking online to see if the price drops but I think the madness is leaving me.

I think.



2 responses to “Can’t Buy Me Love (but can maybe get me a suh-weet pair of earphones)

  1. friend of mine swears by blue tooth headphones but its got this really ugly clip that goes onto a shirt or tie… i just want to be free of wires!!! even my laptop has 6 cables!!

  2. egberto raymundo

    One word: HD800. Best in the world. Man of your means, Malcy-boy, you’d suit ’em, sir…

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